damn it....the joy of December just arrive but i already get a bad dream....really bad dream....the story like this....i was enjoy with my candy but suddenly my tooth patah (knock knock on the wall)....not 1, not 2 but almost all....i still feel like my mouth full with the tooth...i was at my hometown...the first person i told yg my tooth patah was my cousin...after that her husband and the last one is my mother.....this is not the first time i got the same dream but different situation...a month ago i'll got a dream yg a few of my tooth was patah....a few days after tu, one of my friend brother passed away...he not so close with me actually but entah lh kalo mimpi tu ada kaitan dngn dia....i don't know u all but for us, if u dream bout ur gg patah...it show that someone u know will meninggal....i know...its not right to trust such thing but we have our own culture kn....so, up to u all how u accept it ok...don't judge me for that....so back to the dream....my gg not only patah but hancur...don't know why but i felt like my tooth was become pieces.... <sighhh>
bangun2 ja...the first thing i do was take my phone and see the watch....its 8.40am..i know what u think...but im a student...its normal lh kn bngun lewat hehehe...(blh terima kh alasan ni ar)...then type a msg to my sister...a few moments she calls me and ask me bout the dream...she told me to belanja my friend or bersedekah...
me: kenapa lak....
sist: kn ko mimpi tdk bagus...ni sbagai satu cara nk tolak apa2 benda yg tdk bagus...
me: kena buat ke?
sist: yelah..
me: ok2....
trus ak bngun and give money to my house mate....then told them bout the dream....
then taking my bath, breakfast, open my lappy and at 9.26am my other sister call me and ask the same story...
really hope that nothing happen to anyone i know......
BAD DREAM!!!!!
rasa hati ini...
detik waktu bergulir pergi,
meninggalkan diriku yang terkapai sendiri,
dirimu hadir dengan seribu helah,
membuai diriku yang dahagakan kasih,
datangmu tanpaku pinta,
pergimu tanpa kata.
detik masa berlalu pergi,
meninggalkan diriku meraba mencari arah,
walau sinar terang menyuluh hidupku,
hadirmu ternyata melukakan,
pergimu membawa sinar hidupku,
by hand,
MISS AUNTY
10.30pm
SAYANGKU CASPER-MAZNI AZNITA
him.....
this entry i dedicated to him....the one n only one...
his name was Dawid...he older than me em 10 years....hehehe tk lah just tua dr ak 10 hari ja hehehe. actually,ak kenal dia sejak tingkatan 4 (2004) cz kami sma2sekolah kat teknik kudat n 1 kelas plak.....kat sekolah dulu kami mmg tak rapat cz im the talkative person kat kelas n he was the silent boy at class. time tingkatan 4 rasany kami mmg tk bertegur...then time form 5...dia jd ketua kelas n entah di mna silapnya aku di lantik jadi penolong ketua kelas....ni suma hasil pakatan bersama kwn kelas lh ni....but even so, kami mmg tk bnyk cakap pun...just ckp pasal tugas ja n seingat ak satu2nya perbualan panjang d antara ak ngn dia time ak nk pnjam buku harry potter...dia bawa buku 2 p kelas n ak tnampak....disebabkan aku ni jenis tk blh tgok buku...dngn ndak tau malu ak trus pinjam dr dia,,...dia bg pnjam juga akhirny tp bukan dngn kerelaan tp paksaan hehehe...tu pn selepas mcm2 janji ak tabur kat dia just untuk pnjam buku 2.....tak bnyk kenangan kami time skolah cz kami mmg ndak rapat.... then after spm kami mmg lost contact.....pastu dlm bbrapa bulan kot...entah lah tk ingat pun...kami terserempak kat hospital kota belud. time tu ak temankan kakak ak pi oncall, dia lak temankn cousin dia jaga adik ny yg masuk hspital..kakak ak yg tegur dorg cz rupa2 ny dia tu cousin my brother in law...see, kami mmg berjodoh kn hahahaha.......
after 2 kami mmg betul2 lost control until lah 2008. sebelum tu, time ak baru balik dr beaufort, ak terserempak ngn kwn kelas ak kat kk(sofiah)..mean kwn kelas dia juga lh...dia mnta no pon ak n fews day pastu seorg kwn msg ak...he(syahiril) said dia dpt no ak dr kwn yg ak jmpa kt kk 2....n he said someone have asking bout me....guess who???? yups u rite...it was HIM so ak pun mnta lh number dia dr kawan ak 2...... time 2 dia guna no maxis n nk d jadikan citer...time ak kt beaufort..my sist ada beli number maxis but ndak smpai beberapa jam dia guna number 2...dia bg kat ak...so, ak pun msg lah dia guna number maxis kakak ak 2....first msg ak sent kat dia 'knapa cari ak, rindu kh hehehe'....tk lama pastu dia reply....so bbalas lh msg time 2....and the nite around 2-3am he call me thru my clcom number but he don't say anything hehehehe....then msg2 lg until 5am...for the first time, ak tk tdur mlm just because msg with a guy...so...the few days kami mmg just bmsg2 ja...
n 8.5.2008..the story begin between me n him.....
he purpose me at 5.00am...dia mmg lah...suka wat ak tk tido mlm huhuhuhu.....
so....the love story begin....after a few days, he said dia akn balik kb...n tnya nk jumpa kh...so, of course i want lh kn...but kna jumpa ptng ckit lh cz ak time 2 baby sitter kakak ak...then,kami jnji nk jumpa kat cc,n kebetulan ak pun kna p cc cz kna cek tawaran2 smbung blajar yg ak dpt..msa smpai kat cc 2...ak terserempak ngn salah seorang best friend ak kt teknik...lily..dia tnya kat ak...'anas, ko knal kh budak 2, budak kelas ko 2 kn'...ak just angguk2 ja n senyum cz tk tau nk ckp apa....then akpun p lh ambik tmpat kat blkg n pura2 myibukkn diri....tak lma pastu...tpon bunyi n rupany dia msg ak...tnya apasal duduk jauh sngt...then few seconds pastu dia dtng n duduk sebelah ak...mmg time 2 tk ckp apa2 pun...after siap cek email...kami kuar n dsebabkn tk tau nk pi mna..kami ambik keputusan duduk kt depan padang kb tu ja....tjumpa lg seorang classmate ak(masladi)...citer2 jap then trus menuju je destinasi....smpai ja..duduk n diam.....mmg tk ckp apa pun...sngt lucu time 2,ak msg best friend ak (aellycia) 'babe, nk cakap apa ngn dia ni'...tk lama pastu kwn ak reply n gelakkan ak...sengal...hehehehehehe.......then msg masuk lg...ingat kn kwn ak msg rupanya dia. (duduk sebelah ja,tp nk juga msgkn)...boleh dia tnya ak asal diam....pas berbls2 msg...ak kna balik cz dh lewat...then mmg tkjumpa lg pastu...just msg ja....then time pesta menuai tahun 2.,..second date kami kt kk...ak,dia n aellycia....tq babe...kalo tkde u..tk tau lah ak apa jd time 2 hehehehe...
after few months,ak dpt tawaran p melaka...hubungan kami lak...sekejap on sekejap off...sekejap ok sekejap ko...smpai lh sekarang hahahaha....but syukurlah...hubungan kami masih bertahan smpai lh sekarang...3 tahun 6 bulan beberapa hari....6 hari lg genaplh hubungn kami selama 3 tahun 7 bulan....
kami msh selalu bertelagah,masih selalu bertindak tidak matang(actually it was me)...but kami harap hubungan ni akan terus berkekalan until the end....
sebelum ni kmi mmg selalu berjauhan cz 2 tahun ak d melaka n dia di sabah n then bila ak transfer balik sabah...dia lak p johor smbung blajar....mmg sakit lh bila berjauhan ni..bkn sekali kami hmpir menamatkan hubungan ni...bnyk kali but the end kami msh tetap bersama....
satu2ny peristiwa yg btl2 wat ak sakit jiwa time awal tahun 2010....for the first time ak btul2 realize yg ak mmg tk kn dpt lepaskan dia bila ada org len muncul antara kami....mmg time 2 ak sngt down...masuk kelas pun just untuk sign attendance ja...pastu, termenung.....mmg teruk lh time 2....but thanks GOD, we can still together until now.....
Dy, u dont know how i feel that time but its ok...i dont care anymore and i just want to forget that moment...lets moving forwards together...i won't let u go...not anymore...so,dont ever ask me to let u go coz i won't.....
miss aunty
07.18pm
02/11/2011
thIs iS me.....
tOdaY i would likE tO share something bouT me...Myself....
i dont really care about how people think bout me...for me as long as they can respect the ways i carry my life...then i will respect them too. for me its simple....awak tak susah kan hidup saya...saya pn tk kn susahkn hdup awak....
sy sering disalah ertikan sebagai seorang Muslim or time d semenanjung..sy sering dikatakan salah seorang dari mereka...but im not...the true is im sabahan...n i'm christian...my mom was kadazan n my dad from Indonesia....i think my face pun dh tunjukkan yg saya adalah org sabah tp rasanya tidak bagi sesetengah org....
i really like my eyes....cz it was warna hazel....like it heheheehe...
im not beutiful,cute or whatsoever.... im just me...have eyes, nose,ear n etc just like u all... i'm a chubby person huhuhu....really like eat...n eat...apa lg yg ak nk citer kn tntg diri ak ya...
kalo ada apa2 yg ak rasa korg ptt tau tntg ak...ak akn bg tau k...
until the next entry...
wanT tO shaRE what I gOT frOm mY acTvTY : BloGwalKing...
i just finIsH mY bloGwalkINg....its nice to see other blog yg sngt2 cntik.....huhuhu..tk tau lh bila ak nk make up kn my own blog nie.....im prefer for black color than other colors....i just fall in love with black color....
im not sure how many blog yg ak jenguk...but ak just lebih suka jd silent reader ja....menjenguk tnpa meninggal kan jejak....ak sngt suka p jenguk blog para penulis alam maya.....n selalunya menhabiskan masa berjam2 semata2 baca novel online or cerpen online.....n bnyk lh juga blog yg tersenarai dlm list wajib jenguk ak...antarany blog...
~blog anita aruzsi
~okie the witch..
~norhayati berahim
~vanilla ice
~blog incomplete melody n bnyk lh lagi...
feeL guiltY TO HIM.......
msti korg rasa ak bajet bagus wat tajuk cm kat atas 2 kn....sukati korg lh nk ckp apa pn..yg ak tau ak mmg rasa sngt2 bersalah kat MLA 2..ak pun tk tau knpa ada ja yg buat ak rasa tk bleh nk trima...apa ja yg dia buat ak rasa cam salah...cian dia,kena tahan ati ja ngn perangai ak yg ntah apa2 nie...dalam seminggu 2...msti 7 kali bergaduh...korg pndai2 lh faham mksud ak 2 k....kdng2 bila ak kuarkn ayat2 'manis' ak kat dia...msti ak rasa bodoh sngt.....ak tk mksudkn pun apa yg ak ckp kt dia tp entah lh napa selalu terkuar ja perkataan yg myakitkan ati 2...smpai 1 saat ak rasa tk guna pun ak say sorry kat dia sebab esok msti ak wat lagi....but thank GOD coz dia sngt2 lah penyabar ngn angin badai ak ni...walaupun sometimes ak dpt rasa kn yg dia msti rasa nk hempuk kpala ak kat dinding tp dia ndak buat......nasib ar kn....i just hope that he never let me go coz he really mean to me......
MISS AUNTY.